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Women Are Bandaids, Men Are Stitches

Sometimes, not all the time, but sometimes, I love it when stuff breaks, because I get to showoff my uber-hacking skills on whatever is broken- beit the computer, washing machine, car, etc. I just like to fix things. I enjoy working with my hands. There seems to be a great deal of satisfaction at the end of the day after working hard both mentally and physically. If I can't fix it, then I hire the help necessary to get it done. In other words, if something is broken, and I'm around? It won't take long before it's fixed.

Case in point. A friend of mine had his laptop computer recently take a dive. He's used it and abused it. Now, it won't boot from the hard drive. Still to this day, I don't know if it was a hardware failure or the MBR was corrupted, but whatever the case, he called me in, and we got to work. When I arrived at his home, he immediately began explaining that he has sensitive and critical data on the drive that he needs. He was wondering if a data recovery service would be a viable option. I told him, yes, but I had a better idea. I whipped out my DSL 2.3 business card cd out of my wallet, booted off the disk, and was able to mount the drive (which tells me it was a corrupted MBR), and move the data to another location. Even though the drive is lost (we formatted, and reinstalled, and still couldn't boot from it (which tells me it's a hardware issue)), his data is okay. Basically, us two guys got the issue resolved quickly and painlessly.

It wasn't long before we got talking about the differences between men and women. I don't know how we got on the subject, we just did. Well, for those of us who are married, and have been for a while, know that women are emotionally based, and men are logically based. When women are faced with issues or crisis in their lives, they talk it out. They need someone to empathize and sympathize with their feelings. They call their mothers, girlfriends, sisters, cousins or the old lady down the street. They need hours, sometimes days, to really work out the important issues. Even though, at the end, nothing is resolved. No fixes. No resolution. Just feeling better knowing they aren't alone. Anyway, what would women have done if they were in this exact scenario with my friend's laptop? I can tell you exactly what they would've done.

First, she would cry for who knows how long. Then, finally, when she has the strength, she would call someone she knows. She would explain the situation to her friend how frustrating it is and how upset she is. The friend would agree and share similar experiences. Then tangents would start popping up all over the place, and they would end up talking about something that isn't even related to the task at hand. After much weeping, hugging and understanding and several hours later, the friend would leave knowing that everything is okay, and that they can get it fixed or just let it go as no big deal. If worst came to worst, they'll just have their husbands take care of it. Needless to say, the laptop would still be broken, and the data not recovered.

Now tell me if this makes sense. Of course not, but it isn't far from the truth. Now my question is why? I know all women aren't like this, and all men aren't Mr. Fixit either, but why does this phenomenon exist? Can you imagine what that situation would be like if her husband came over to fix it first off (of course you can, you're married, and know the situation all too well)?

Husband: "Ok. What's the problem?"
Wife weeping: "I don't know. I just don't know what to do. Why can't it just work?"
Wife weeping even harder: "And I had the roughest day at work. No one likes me, and everyone thought that Mrs. Jones looked cute. I must not look cute. I don't feel cute."
Husband: "Dear, you look cute. Now, let's see what the problem is on your laptop."
Wife in a stressed tone: "Don't you care about my feelings? I told you I had a tough day at work today, and I still don't feel cute."
Husband: "But dear, don't you want your laptop fixed?"
Wife still sobbing: "Yes, but I want to know that you think I look cute. Mrs. Jones was wearing..."

You get the idea. This is why I think women are bandaids. They don't necessarily stop the bleeding, just cover it up with talking and touchy-feely emotions in hopes it will stop. Sometimes this means going through 3 or 4 or 5 bandaids. This is also why I think men are like stitches. Medical sucher. We dig into the problem, get the necessary tools we need to get the job done, and get to work. Once finished, not only has the bleeding stopped, but we did a cleanup job and it looks great. But most importantly, the job once broken, is broken no longer.

I just had to post this, because it seems my wife is going through a midlife crisis right now, and thus putting me through one as well. 🙂

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